Many jobs are difficult, but some are clearly more challenging than others. Take the recent story of a drug dealer released from jail only to return within a few hours of his release. It seems the man, released from a Philadelphia jail about 6:15PM, hadn’t even made it out of the parking lot when he beat up a woman and stole her car, taking her one-year old grandson, who was strapped in the back seat, along for the ride.

Apparently this guy had no idea how Uber is supposed to work.

Now, this less than brilliant drug dealer only made it about two miles before he wrecked the car. No more than 15 minutes had elapsed at this point. At this point he did what any self-respecting drug dealer who had just been released from jail and committed assault, robbery and kidnapping in the jails parking lot would do; he ran into the woods, because we know the police never look there for errant criminals. The dumbass was in custody within the hour and back in the same jail by the next morning. His bail this time around is $250,000.

Some people are just no good on their own.

I want to consider blaming the training he may have received for the job he held. It is fairly clear that some basic rules were skipped when this guy went through his drug sales apprenticeship. I would think that for drug dealers, as many other criminal variants, “Don’t commit a felony on your way out of jail” should be in the first chapter of any training manual. It is a shame that his trainers really let him down. I’m sure he thought the carjacking was a good idea at the time.

The woman and her grandchild, for the record, will be fine. The child was uninjured, and the woman received cuts and bruising about her face but sustained no serious injuries. The drug dealer turned free man turned carjacking kidnapper has been charged with kidnapping, robbery of a vehicle and two counts each of aggravated assault and reckless endangerment. A Dec. 21 preliminary hearing is set.

No word if they plan to let him out to finish his Christmas shopping. I’d suggest they call him a cab this time if they do.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *